If You Want Me To

It is amazing the ways God has been speaking to me over the last few months through different people, sermons, and things I have read and heard. I have been to several different churches during this time, and I cannot tell you how many of those sermons have spoken directly to my heart and where I am right now in my life. I have really tried to be open and listen-because I know he has been speaking and working.

After Rachel encouraged me with the verse of James, it seems to keep coming up. I went to Mardel before leaving on my latest trek across the country, because I wanted to pick up the newest Casting Crowns CD, and found some great deals on a couple of demo CD's. One of them was "A Night in Rocketown". Little did I know what a blessing it would be. One of the tracks was a song titled "If You Want Me To" by Ginny Owens. Previous to that song, is a track called "Ginny's story".

Ginny Owens is an amazing songwriter, piano player, and singer. Ginny was a varsity cheerleader and the valedictorian of her class in high school, then she went to college pursuing a music degree with the dream of one day being a high school choir director. Oh, did I mention that Ginny has been blind since the age of two?

But, here is the best part of the story: she had been searching and searching for a job, had been applying, calling, sending out resumes, and interviewing for job after job (sounds familiar!)...and was so frustrated because no one wanted to hire her (which she said no one would really come out and tell her why, but she had a good idea). Anyway, she was really frustrated and read something in a book that changed her perspective and inspired this song. A lady was addressing a letter she had received from a girl, who was telling her about all of these bad things that had gone wrong in her life. The girl stated that she knew that the trials were going to make her stronger. The lady responded by saying, "You know, it is never the trial that makes us stronger. It is what we choose to do with that trial". Wow. Ginny went on to say that what matters is if we choose to lay that at the foot of the cross and say "Lord I give this to you", and we choose to know that he has us exactly where we are supposed to be. During that time, she found a verse that encouraged her. Can you guess what that verse was? Yes, James 1:2-4, which I want to share again:

Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

I was reading the whole chapter the other day in church, and found this in verse 12:

Blessed is the man who perseveres under trial, because when he has stood the test, he will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.

I don't know why I had to leave ACU when I did, I don't know why I have been looking for so long and things have not panned out yet. But I do know this: God has always been there-leading, guiding, and making a path for me. I know that He has a plan for me, a purpose-much larger than I am or could ever imagine. I know that one day I will be made perfect and complete in Him, which is why I press on towards that goal. Meanwhile, I am thankful to be on this journey with you all. I pray this song and the words encourage and touch you like they have me. Trust me-it is worth your time :)